Request.

I have neurosurgeons appointment tomorow.

And my anxiety is in space.

The surgeon is really good heard about him. But so far my case was in the hands of renound doctors..sometimes some things are just written for you.

You cant really help it.

But guess how i am preparing for appointment… i have a concoction of coconut oil olive oil and ground coffee on my head.. now i want hair like Repunzel!

I m just trying to divert my mind. Whatever it takes. Took out my guitar today. Got inspired by unicorn junior. Now i cant decide what to learn…the rest can follow this part is tough.

Well.

It’s tomorow and im scared about. I dont know whats worse having a benign brain tumor or autoimmune…so im just praying it turns out to be something that can be easily treated so that i can go back to my life.

My normal life..like the normal lives everyone has.

It’s good to be different. I am never ungrateful about my blessings. But sometimes i do long for the life people around me has. I know it sounds like envy but its not. Or maybe its a very mild form of it.

But it happens doesnt it?

When your life is suspended with a thread a point comes you want to sit somewhere and rest.

Not that i have anything less. I never say that. I know people with bigger struggles.

But people only see material things. Sometimes i want to tell them to get into my body and live my life for a few days. Few days will be enough to know the truth.

There are a few things that people look at and judge if you have a good life or not. Being happy or peaceful barely counts in that.

Happiness is not what you see.

Well. We drifted..

I just want to request you all to pray that it turns out to be something easily treatable and i get treated and recover soon.

Please keep me in prayers. Next weeks/months are crucial. And tomorow.. im scared of tomorow tbh.I have neurosurgeons appointment tomorow.

And my anxiety is in space.

The surgeon is really good heard about him. But so far my case was in the hands of renound doctors..sometimes some things are just written for you.

You cant really help it.

But guess how i am preparing for appointment… i have a concoction of coconut oil olive oil and ground coffee on my head.. now i want hair like Repunzel!

I m just trying to divert my mind. Whatever it takes. Took out my guitar today. Got inspired by unicorn junior. Now i cant decide what to learn…the rest can follow this part is tough.

Well.

It’s tomorow and im scared about. I dont know whats worse having a benign brain tumor or autoimmune…so im just praying it turns out to be something that can be easily treated so that i can go back to my life.

My normal life..like the normal lives everyone has.

It’s good to be different. I am never ungrateful about my blessings. But sometimes i do long for the life people around me has. I know it sounds like envy but its not. Or maybe its a very mild form of it.

But it happens doesnt it?

When your life is suspended with a thread a point comes you want to sit somewhere and rest.

Not that i have anything less. I never say that. I know people with bigger struggles.

But people only see material things. Sometimes i want to tell them to get into my body and live my life for a few days. Few days will be enough to know the truth.

There are a few things that people look at and judge if you have a good life or not. Being happy or peaceful barely counts in that.

Happiness is not what you see.

Well. We drifted..

I just want to request you all to pray that it turns out to be something easily treatable and i get treated and recover soon.

Please keep me in prayers. Next weeks/months are crucial. And tomorow.. im scared of tomorow tbh.