Fight for yourself!

I’m triggered these days. It’s been a week in my culture and I feel I’m going to throw up or my head will explode.

It’s depressing women are so badly defeated they voluntarily stay in physically abusive relationships, mental and emotional abuse doesn’t even count.

Half of my head hurts. Recently in 2, 3 situations I tried to speak up for the innocent person when my side was a guilty one but it didn’t work.

It’s a nonstop cycle. You see injustice . You try to explain people that it’s wrong. And the you are the outspoken and disobedient one.

And I’m getting tired of this.

I saw this in a restroom of a mall in Dubai.

And I am proud of this organisation for their effort. It was everywhere in the bathroom.

But then I thought how many women would have dared to contact them?

Here comes the frightening part, very few. Probably none.

I have known plenty of cases to believe that.

Every country has a law. Every religion has law for domestic violence. Then why do our women still staying with assholes?

Let me answer you this.

Because people misinterpret law.

I was just working with dad on a case and we could see 50 dimensions a situation can be twisted depending on what side you are on.

I’m a Muslim and I can only speak for my religion. People picked a few verses for thier advantage and exploited women on those.

It’s not fault of a whole book or whole religion, if part of a verse is picked and manipulated.

People do the same with laws everywhere. Don’t let this happen to you.

I have never been a feminist. I had more guy friends than girl friends and I was closer to my dad. But as I grew up I couldn’t help notice the injustice especially when I fell prey to it.

There is a constant black hole in my life that I don’t have strength to talk about, as this place is a escape from that hell hole.


There’s is something I want you all to know.


No matter where you are at least read the basics. Everything is available online.

Know your standing.

It’s not restricted to abuse only.

If you doubt there is something someone can exploit you with, read about it.

You don’t have to be a licensed attorney. Just read the basics.

Like a simple short story.

And in case you are in a middle of a case, and you have a lawyer. Still read!

Lawyers can overlook tons of things, intentionally or unintentionally.

The letter we had was drafted with advice from 2 lawyers and a judge, and we didn’t know if thier level of intellect is sad or funny.

So do your own research.

I am telling you from my own experience. No one will fight for you as valiantly as you can.

Don’t take yourself for granted and don’t let anyone exploit, abuse or manipulate you.

Life doesn’t end with an abusive relationship/marriage. Give yourself a chance.

And please fight! Fight for yourself!

You are worth saving.

You are worth all the happiness in the world.

Kindly visit my post Warriors Invited To Raise Mental Health Awareness where I am inviting Mental Health Warriors to submit their blog’s address so that we can join hands to control this wildfire.

Copyright © 2019 stoneronarollercoaster – All rights reserved

37 thoughts on “Fight for yourself!

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  1. “Feminist” is now a negative because of rightwing brainwashing, but it is a perfectly great word to describe a woman who desires equal rights under the law and freedom from misogyny. There is no reason why a feminist should not have male friends or be a wife or mommy or have any other role of her choice.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Honestly I am confused about definition of feminism now. I was never this vocal about women rights earlier in my life.
      I believe more in equality. Maybe that falls under feminism.
      I simply want every human to be treated fairly. Which shouldn’t be that tough but sadly it is.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It shouldn’t be. Some of the nasty rightwing types have for decades been putting the words “feminist” and “lesbian” together or using really negative stereotypes like “man-hating” and “baby-killing” in front of “feminist,” so that in people’s minds it has become a bad word. It’s a propaganda tactic. The far right does not want rights for women or any group but white straight men.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. That’s crazy. What do feminism have to do with any of that. It’s simply about letting women exercise their basic rights.
        Like..please don’t verbally physically emotionally mentally abuse women. And let them choose. I don’t know why this is hard.

        I didn’t want it to be focused on women but that’s how this post flowed.

        Women need to stand up for themselves. It doesn’t happen overnight but they need to give themselves a chance.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Excellent post and points! Happens in every religion. Bad people exist everywhere and twist what they will.
    In Christianity , some men will twist that a wife should submit to her husband to the limit that all women should be subordinate to them personally, etc. Yet, they don’t recognize the command the husband is given concerning the wife. He is commanded to love the wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it. ( sacrifice unto death) that’s a strong command of love.
    Likewise it says:
    You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
    They pick and choose what they follow to suit their self.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. That’s exactly what they did to Islam and Quran.
      They play with our lack of knowledge. When we are born into a system we barely question it’s rules and mindset. It’s the bad ones as me who start questioning and then get labeled as disobedient and rebellious. And disrespectful, which I am not.
      In fact I am the one respecting basic human needs.
      That’s why i urge everyone read their own cases and look for their options and fight for them. Nobody will do it for you.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I was a teenager in the 60s and in the early 70s I was a protester. I describe myself as a feminist and my daughter would describe herself as one too. But we live in Canada. It is acceptable to be a feminist in Canada. As for abuse…my daughter walked out of an abusive relationship, after calling the police, with her baby in the car seat. She said she had to leave to protect her son and also to save herself before she started to believe she was worthy of abuse. This is what can happen to those who stay. They loose all sense of their own worth. My daughter is a warrior woman and she went out and found a baby sitter and got two part time jobs. I could not be more proud of her. She has now moved on and found a good relationship and her life is turned around. This is my too long response to your post. It is so important to support women who are abused and help them to save themselves. Thanks for this post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m proud of your daughter too. She saved her life and life of her child too.
      A distant relative of mine is in an abusive marriage and even though her family wants her to come back and supporting her, she still goes back to that monster saying “I’m doing this for my kids”
      I told my family this is just going to be worse for the kids as well.
      These 2 recent stories have split my mind into half.
      You are right. They lose sense of their self worth even if you scream it to them.
      And yes women needs to stand for women. Mostly its women who tell each other to just surrender blindly. This needs to stop. I dont know how though.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Don’t be afraid to take your basic rights, speak loudly. Sometimes in life, we have to fight for our rights. I always do that. Don’t let yourself affected. Once my brother told me,” sis don’t take tension but give tension.” At that time, I thought he was immature. However, yes sometimes, you have to do that for your own good and mental peace. Men and women are equal. But I know sometimes women need to fight, but nothing wrong in fighting for your own rights.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ahhaha my brother says that too at times. People have been really mean to us.
      Well yes. There is nothing wrong. But to social pressures have ruined our confidence to the core. It’s hard to stand up for yourself when asking for your rights mean you are rebelling against culture. Which is plain stupid!


  5. Couldn’t agree more. Was just having this same conversation with a colleague earlier about Muslim countries in general and how Islam is picked apart so they can choose which parts of it to enforce and which parts to ignore. Hence women’s rights have been sidelined for years! So sad 💔

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Elders tend to be stuck in their ways unfortunately. The only hope of change is if the younger generation can implement it rather than carry it in. For example, in our culture it’s so normal to pray for a son and detest having daughters. You would think that our generation would not hold on to this silly prejudice yet I personally know girls my age and younger who are carrying on this unislamic and unfair practice. 💔


  6. My first husband, after we split due to his drug use, busted my door in and tried to strangle me Valentine’s Day. That was the final straw. He preferred cocaine over me, wouldn’t get help, and I just had to save myself.

    Liked by 1 person

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