So, my friend was visiting me with her 6 months old baby and big baby (husband).
Now here’s a problem. I dont hold babies in my arms I get scared they will slip out or I wont hold them right and could injure them. They are really small and under construction, it’s like wet cement so I just koochikoo with them from a distance.
And the other reason they suddenly decide, my spine is a concave lens not a convex lens and stiffen. Like curve thier back and just suddenly be strong and stiff. That’s terrifying.
But my friend is really nice girl and this baby smiles whenever he sees me it’s a jolly funny baby.
So I thought maybe I should explain to her or she could be wondering if I think her baby is ugly or something, which he low-key is (dont judge me for this). My friend is really pretty so in my heart I was already saying “girl why did you marry him, look what happened”.
I told her, “you know I can’t hold babies I’m afraid they will slip from my hands because kids suddenly start seal dance.”
With this I started rotating my arms in 2 small circles in front of me imagining a dancing seal.
I was in a trance a swear.
Then she said “have you seen that chicken grilling in that fridge like machine with glass door (somebody give this lady a medal for description) and then she started making imaginary circles with her forefingers.
We both were doing this crazy shit in trance untill we noticed we were making her husband really uncomfortable.
But seriously! That’s exactly what babies do.
You hold them in your arms and they coo a little and you know you got life figured and suddenly..No I’m a concave lens!!
If they just decide on one shape, or where they belong in animal kingdom, I wouldn’t be recieving judgy stares!
That’s all for now.
Have a good day